*a quick Friday self helpy post.*
So here’s a situation I find myself in from time to time… Perhaps you do too?
You’ve been wronged by someone and it really really pisses you off. The person in question has admitted they wronged you, but even worse, they also admitted they don’t care. It’s just the way it is. You have to get over it, or you can keep pushing. At which point they are going to keep pushing you right back. Push. Shove. Push. Shove. And it can go on like this for… weeks? Months? Who knows really?
All the while that little voice inside of you is screaming THIS IS NOT FAIR. I am in the right here. I played by the rules. They did not. This is not OK! This just isn’t right.
And when you finally break it down, after wasting a lot of time dwelling and worrying and being upset over something you can’t control, you understand that voice that has been screaming inside of you this entire time is … ego! Of course, it is. It always is.
Per the usual, Ego needs to make sure it’s heard. It needs EVERYONE to know how right it is, how scorned it is, how much credit is deserves, blah blah blah. It’s the same old thing.
So that’s just a watered down version of the hell I put myself through last month, or was it two months ago? Who can keep track at this point. After I calmed down a bit, I did what I always do to make myself feel better in a situation like this (they’re getting quite routine for me) which is pop on a self help book or podcast, grab the leash, and take Har for a very long walk.
The words that helped me this time came from Jen Sincero and they went something like this,
“When you choose happiness and freedom over wanting to be right or prideful, you win.”
And when I let that sink in I felt that bag of bricks I’ve been carrying across my back lifted right off of me.
I’m so naturally stubborn and pig headed that my instinct is always to fight and hold on, rather than just let go. I trick myself into thinking that fighting feels better, because I’m STICKING UP FOR MYSELF!
But it doesn’t feel better. It never does. I need to remind myself that there are plenty of other ways to stick up for yourself rather than wasting your time and energy on circumstances and people that don’t matter.
What we focus on, we create more of... I’ve been repeating this over and over and it blows my mind how true it is.
The more dramatic and pissed of I got, the more drama and pissy situations filled my life.
So now, I’ve been focusing on abundance and gratitude. Because I know that so much of my anger and frustration is always rooted in the fear of lacking – fear that there’s not enough customers out there, or ideas, money, opportunities, it doesn’t matter, the list could go on and on.
And the Universe. Is. Abundant. It wants you to succeed. If you don’t believe me, say it a few more times. Then write it down in a notebook ten times. Do it as much as you have to until you start to believe it.
Focus on what you want. Forget about what you don’t.
Someone else finding success does not mean that you are losing it.
And this my friends, has been a peek inside my self help journal this week 🙂 Did it scare you? Hopefully not, because this is only the tip of the crazy thoughts I write down on a daily basis.
With that said, I hope you have a really good weekend and spread good vibes to people you know, and people you don’t.